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    I was speaking with a wise man, telling the truth about myself. He interrupted me in my story telling. He was clearly telling me that my story was too long and irrelevant. In a recent conference call I told the truth about myself. My story was about 8 minutes long, and I could hear the guy in the back of my head attacking me and telling me to drop the story. I didn’t. I ended the conference call with only an advice to get a coach. I didn’t feel listened to. None of my fears were addressed or commented on. I’m thinking it’s partly my fault since I brought up several fears and behaviors scattered over the 8 minutes I was telling the story. I’m afraid that I wasn’t clear enough. I’m afraid that I’m wrapping my truth telling up in a too long story, distracting the listener from the details that matter. Is 8 minutes generally too long? I have difficulties keeping it short. I’m afraid I’ll miss out on important information. At the end of the call I only feel resentful because all my talking didn’t result in me feeling heard anyway.


    Hi Christoffer. The short answer to your question is it depends. It would help me to know how long you’ve been doing Real Love. Initially, we often feel that someone has to hear lots of details in order to understand us..We’ve spent a lifetime wanting someone to listen to us (without much success). This leaves us in the position of thinking that what we say isn’t important. The PCSD book talks a lot about the baggage we carry from our childhoods.

    Learning to tell the truth without embellishment takes practice. What are you afraid of? Are you able to answer that in no more than two sentences? These are questions I asked callers when I was doing a Real Love Conference Call.

    You’re welcome to ask all the questions you want.


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