Real Love Pearls: Pearl: Only with Faith

This statement comes not from a pearl card, but from the first Real Love book. There are four things we must do consistently to find the unconditional love we all need: have a desire to change, have faith, tell the truth about ourselves, and give up our Getting and Protecting behaviors. Tonight's topic is about having faith.

Even after we've learned about the principles of Real Love, have begun to use them and even seen some happier results, it's easy to go back into our old unproductive behaviors and beliefs when we feel empty or afraid. When we're feeling discouraged, it can be hard to believe that things will ever get better. We want to just give up and stay in the momentary relief from pain that the old behaviors bring. It sometimes feels easier than doing something new. But of course the pain and loneliness always return.

If we want life to be different, WE have to do things differently¾even if we've never done it before. That's where faith comes in. When we exercise faith, it's not just about thinking or talking. With faith, we choose to believe that something is true, and then we have to ACT on those beliefs, even when we are afraid. If we want our lives to be different, to be happier, we have to DO something different.

It doesn't have to be huge. It doesn't have to be changing everything in every moment. It only has to start with one thing, something that you know can make a difference. Perhaps it's a phone call to someone, telling the truth about yourself that you're feeling afraid or discouraged or alone. If that's too scary, it can be as simple as listening to some truths on the Real Love website, or reading in the books. (Reading and hearing real truth has a way of calming a racing mind.) Maybe it's making a choice to go do something for someone else, to get out of thinking about yourself and your troubles. Maybe it's just taking a walk and deciding to smile at anyone you see.

The key is to choose to have faith that doing things differently will truly make a difference. It means stepping out and trying something different even when you don't feel like it. When your mind is telling you it's not worth the effort, it means deciding, "What do I have to lose?"

It's understandable and to be expected that we will have ups and downs as we make this journey. Life is like that. Keeping the faith that the principles are true and that when we practice them consistently, we WILL be happier goes a long way to making the journey smoother.

Question to think about: What is one thing I can do today that will increase my happiness

Pearls & Principles Call, Monday Eastern at 9:00 PM with Coach Joanne.