Relationships

Skypeid: Magicallad

   I seem to find it so hard to accept that how I feel in my relationship is all to do with me and not what my partner is doing.  Is it?  I'll give an example.  He brings his laptop to bed.  It is the last thing he touches at night and the first thing he touches in the morning.  I find myself feeling lonely around this.  When he wakes he is on it straight away and often I can get up, get dressed and have breakfast and he is still up in bed on the machine.  This happens at night too - although sometimes he is downstairs watching the TV while I wash, change and go to bed.  
Now as I am writing this I am wondering whether this behaviour is a demonstration of how unloved he feels by me so maybe the situation is all to do with me after all.  And I can very much accept that that may well be very true too.  

Is it that if I was full I could just be ok with this?  Right now I am having real real trouble being okay with it.  I feel really lonely around it.  I want him to change.  I sit there and think if only he would be different. 

Meanwhile I don't commit to him because I am afraid and he clearly knows that I am not committing to him and what does that say to him?  

Well this is right pickle.  

x 

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DoobyDoo Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List New Member Joined: 29 May 2011 Online Status: Offline Posts: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote DoobyDoo Report Post Quote Reply Topic: Relationships Posted: 29 May 2011 at 7:49am
	I seem to find it so hard to accept that how I feel in my relationship is all to do with me and not what my partner is doing. Is it? I'll give an example. He brings his laptop to bed. It is the last thing he touches at night and the first thing he touches in the morning. I find myself feeling lonely around this. When he wakes he is on it straight away and often I can get up, get dressed and have breakfast and he is still up in bed on the machine. This happens at night too - although sometimes he is downstairs watching the TV while I wash, change and go to bed. Now as I am writing this I am wondering whether this behaviour is a demonstration of how unloved he feels by me so maybe the situation is all to do with me after all. And I can very much accept that that may well be very true too. Is it that if I was full I could just be ok with this? Right now I am having real real trouble being okay with it. I feel really lonely around it. I want him to change. I sit there and think if only he would be different. Meanwhile I don't commit to him because I am afraid and he clearly knows that I am not committing to him and what does that say to him? Well this is right pickle. x

Magical Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Visit Members Homepage Add to Buddy List Real Love Coach Joined: 17 May 2007 Online Status: Offline Posts: 151	Post Options Post Reply Quote Magical Report Post Quote Reply Posted: 29 May 2011 at 11:23am
	Hey Dooby, It sounds as though you are not getting the love you need. Have you both discussed Real love, and practicing the real love principles? Step one is for you to feel loved. Clearly from your partner's behaviour he is not able to give you what you need right now. Love you Magical
	Skypeid: Magicallad

Mark Johnson Members Profile Send Private Message Find Members Posts Add to Buddy List New Member Joined: 26 Jul 2011 Location: USA Online Status: Offline Posts: 1	Post Options Post Reply Quote Mark Johnson Report Post Quote Reply Posted: 23 Aug 2011 at 2:11pm
	I think discussion is the key to a good relationship. Both of you should keep calm and hear each other out before jumping on to any conclusion. A quote illustrates the importance of marriage: "Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years." Edited by rlpkaren - 24 Aug 2011 at 9:32am