|
| Understanding the Causes of Drug Addiction | Member Benefits | |||||||||||||||||
|
A Revolutionary Definition of Addiction and Proposal for Its Cause and Treatment In this article:
WHAT IS ADDICTION?—A New Defintion of Addiction Most people associate the word addiction with alcohol or drugs, but that association severely and inappropriately limits the extent of addiction in our society. A new definition of addiction is needed, one which will give us a better grasp of the nature of addiction and will enable us to approach its treatment in a far more productive way. Addiction is the compulsive use of any substance, person, feeling, or behavior with a relative disregard of the potentially negative social, psychological, and physical consequences. This definition of addiction creates a much broader—and more accurate—picture of addiction, which we will demonstrate in much greater detail throughout the remainder of this article. Before we can meaningfully continue our discussion of addiction, however, we must first consider its causes in a new way. WHAT ARE THE CAUSES OF DRUG ADDICTION AND OTHER TYPES OF ADDICTION? Despite all the research done on this subject, there is no consensus on the cause of addiction. Some theories have been proposed, however:
Regardless of the specific cause espoused, most experts regard addiction as a disease, and many believe it’s inherited. They believe that people inherit the tendency to addiction, even if they never actually become addicted to a specific substance. A New and Powerful Explanation for Addiction Dr. Baer has now worked intimately with thousands of addicts, and he proposes a cause for addiction that is radically different from those generally discussed. This proposal explains the overall data of addiction better than other theories do, and this proposed cause has allowed the development of a treatment plan that has proven to be very effective with thousands of addicts. Addiction is not a disease. Addiction is a response to pain. “After extensive interviews with thousands of addicts,” says Dr. Baer, “less than one percent of them fail to respond enthusiastically to this definition of addiction and the clarification of the causes of drug addiction, whereas most of them have had serious problems with the usual definitions and explanations.” In order to understand the cause of drug addiction, we must first understand what is required for human beings to be happy, a subject sorely neglected in mental health research and literature. We tend to usually focus our attention to an inappropriate degree on illness and on the treatment of disease. We all understand that physical health requires more than simply the elimination of disease. In order to be physically healthy, we must also attend to positive qualities and behaviors—nutrition, exercise, shelter, and so on. In a similar way, mental health requires that we attend to the acquisition and maintenance of positive required elements, not just the elimination of negative factors, or disease. The most important requirement for our emotional health and happiness is to feel loved. Our souls require feeling loved in just as real a way as our bodies require air and food. We need to feel cared for and to feel connected to other human beings. There’s a reason that such a huge portion of our novels and movies take love as a theme. Love is a basic human need. Real Love But not just any kind of love will do. The only kind of love that can fill us up and make us whole emotionally is Real Love. Real Love is caring about the happiness of another person without any thought for what we might get for ourselves. It’s also Real Love when other people care about our happiness unconditionally. With Real Love, people are not disappointed or angry when we make our foolish mistakes, when we don’t do what they want, or even when we inconvenience them personally. When I use the word happiness, I do not mean the brief
and superficial pleasure that comes from money, sex, power, and the
conditional approval we earn from others when we behave as they want.
Nor do I mean the temporary feeling of satisfaction we experience in
the absence of immediate conflict or disaster. Real happiness is not
the feeling we get from being entertained or making people do what
we want. It’s a profound and lasting sense of peace and fulfillment
that deeply satisfies and enlarges the soul. It doesn’t go away
when circumstances are difficult. It survives and even grows during
hardship and struggle. True happiness is our entire reason to live,
and it can only be obtained as we find Real Love and share it with
others. With Real Love, nothing else matters; without it, nothing else
is enough. Sadly, few of us have sufficiently received or given Real Love. From the time we were small children, we observed that when we didn’t fight with our sisters, didn’t make too much noise in the car, got good grades, and were otherwise obedient and cooperative, our parents and others smiled at us, patted our heads, and spoke kindly. With their words and behavior, they told us what good boys and girls we were, and we felt loved. But what happened when we did fight with our sisters, made too much noise, got bad grades, and dragged mud across the clean living room carpet? Did people smile at us then or speak gentle, loving words? No—they frowned, sighed with disappointment, and often spoke in harsh tones. Just as the positive behaviors of other people communicated to us that we were loved, we could interpret the withdrawal of those behaviors only as an indication that we were not being loved. Although it was unintentional, our parents and others taught us this terrible message: “When you’re good, I love you, but when you’re not, I don’t—or certainly I love you a great deal less.” This conditional love can give us brief moments of satisfaction, but we’re still left with a huge hole in our souls, because only Real Love can make us genuinely happy. When someone is genuinely concerned about our happiness, we feel connected to that person. We feel included in his or her life, and in that instant we are no longer alone. Each moment of unconditional acceptance creates a living thread to the person who accepts us, and these threads weave a powerful bond that fills us with a gRevenuine and lasting happiness. Nothing but Real Love can do that. In addition, when we know that even one person loves us unconditionally, we feel a connection to everyone else. We feel included in the family of all mankind, of which that one person is a part. Without sufficient Real Love, we can only feel empty and alone, which is our greatest fear and source of pain. Continue reading about Addiction: What we do in the absence of Real Love You'll receive hundreds of hours of Real Love online education as a member of RealLove.com. Everyday we provide new content and instruction on finding happines in your life. Learn to look at life through the clarifying lens of Real Love and eliminate the confusion and frustration in your life.
|
|
|||||||||||||||||
|